Tracking numbers are generated upon completion of payment for an order. YOU MUST ENTER A TRACKING EMAIL ADDRESS TO RECEIVE THE TRACKING NUMBER. If you entered a tracking email address and do not see the email, please check your spam or promotions folders.
Yes. We guarantee it. Now if you want to wait about a week after ordering your package and call or e-mail that special someone and ask them if they just got a special package that is up to you, but rest assured we will never tell. Want to be extra careful? Pay with our cash option where you mail in the order form (or just number) and payment.
We accept Visa, Mastercard, American Express, Discover and Paypal. Credit cards are processed by Paypal, the world leader in secure e-commerce. We are also now accepting cash! This option is at the bottom of the order confirmation page.
Your package will leave our facility within 5 - 7 business days of being ordered. Most delivery times are 3 - 4 days. We only ship to the Continental United States.
It ranges from $7.95 to $9.95 depending on the size of the pile of poop your sending. The cost is clearly marked on the order page along side the price of the different packages. The above price range also includes handling cost. (which is a shitty job but somebody has to handle it.)
Only the mad scientist that packs this stuff in the back room knows for sure and he wouldn't tell us, but we do know this, it really smells bad back there, he is mixing up shit, and he does visit the local dairy farm and zoo about twice a week. (We also don't want the delivery company to actually know what kind of shit they're delivering.) We can assure you that it looks nasty and really stinks. It will get the point across to your intended victim.
Sure, we do bulk and custom orders. Please use the contact form for such requests.
No, for legal reasons we do not allow customer created notes to be sent in the packages. It will contain a business card as shown on the home page.
Yes and we've been in business since 2007. Sending an anonymous non-hazardous package through the US Postal Service is indeed legal. Please review our legal page for more information.
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